The Project Update (7 months late)


So, back in March I posted about an experience I had, where God warned me He was going to push me out of my job

I promised an update, and never delivered, because right after that post, shit went insane!

  • My job continued to be an exercise in navigating the nine circles of hell.  In April, I wrote my resignation letter, dated it June 11th, and emailed it to myself for future reference.  More on that later.
  • I (barely) survived University Ballet of Chicago's production of Coppelia.  (If you scroll down far enough you will see me in one of the pictures.  I was THE fattest, stubbiest human being in the entire production and had more fun than ever.)
  • I had to leave my residence.  That was unexpected.  For various reasons that I won't get into, there was absolutely no way I could continue to live there.  Luckily, through what can only be described as supernatural means, I received assistance in locating the perfect apartment in Hyde Park, which cut my work commute in thirds and my ballet commute even more, and has mirrors on the closet doors and a kitchen counter that doubles as a barre.
  • I made a wedding dress for my friend Lauren.  It was the coolest thing I have ever made.
  • On June 11th, the day I was set to quit my job, an interesting internal job posting popped up and I decided "Why the hell not?"  So instead of handing my boss a resignation letter, I handed her an application (same thing as far as she was concerned, as the position was in another department).  I interviewed a few weeks later, was offered the position in mid-July, and started in mid-August.  My experience at work has made a 180 degree turnaround since then, and I am going to stick around for a while.
  • Something happened in my relationship, but that is a story for another day.
  • And, I got into the next ballet, which of course you are going to come see next year, right?

What's the point of all this rambling?

The point is, that in an instant your life can change.  In an instant, everything can turn around.  It can all happen fast, and it can all happen at once.  (These last 7 months to me felt like 7 days!)

What you're going through right now, that seems like hell, can literally disappear from your consciousness almost by magic.

Because the God who made this world gives a fuck.  And is just waiting for you to ask.

Next up: a series of posts about ballet.

Peace and Love,


I'm on day 2 of Astra's 21 Day Create-A-Thon Challenge, and today I found myself pressed for time and brainpower.

Well, if I can't create a poem or a painting or a dress or a sales video...certainly I can at least create something in the kitchen, right?

Here's a confession:  I fucking love chocolate.  I'm a little bit obsessed with it.  I'd be lost without it. 

Maybe you can relate?

This recipe, affectionately named "What The Fudge," came about one day when I came home from work to find that I had no chocolate, and no money to procure chocolate. 

However, I did have things lying around the house that I discovered could easily be transformed into a delicious, chocolatey treat.  It's so easy to make and I promise just a little bit will get you high on life.

Here is the recipe:

Mix together roughly equal amounts of cacao powder, raw honey, coconut oil, and natural nut butter.

That's it.

You can then spoon it into candy molds and refrigerate, or just eat it with a spoon. I won't tell.

Why do I say this is healthy?

Well, it's not low-fat.  It's not low-calorie.  And it's not low-sugar either.

However, it is 100% pure, natural food, with no preservatives and no chemicals. 

Coconut oil is an incredibly healthy fat.

Raw honey also provides health benefits you can't get from refined sugar.

Organic cacao powder is high in antioxidants--even better if it's raw.

And nut butters are also a good source of healthy fats and vegetarian protein.

It tastes better than it looks.  I promise. 



Can I make a confession here?

I really don't know what the fuck I'm doing with this Internet marketing deal.

There...I said it.

I said what 98% of other marketers out there probably should be saying because a lot of them are in the exact same boat I am in.

The truth income right now is coming from family support and my corporate job.  And that is what pays the bills to keep this site online right now.

The truth is...I've gotten two customers after 1 year and 4 months in business, and lost them both.  I have learned a lot so far...but I still have a lot to learn.

Here is what I know:

I know that I have something to share with the world.

And I know that having this blog (get one here if you want, enter your email to get random awesomeness delivered to your inbox when I feel like sending it, and feel free to watch the hypey-as-fuck, yet oddly seductive sales video if you want, or don't watch it if you don't want) is a good enough way to share it, for the moment.

And I know...that if I never quit, I'm going to get to exactly where I want to go.

Which is, simply, to live a life of beauty.

That's it.  That's what I want.  That's the dream that keeps me up late at night.

I could give two fucks about being rich on the Internet.  I really don't care that much about it.  If I can have pretty things and take dance classes and be healthy and in shape and in love...I don't care where the resources to do these things come from (as long as it's moral, legal, and has integrity, that is).

In the final analysis, they all come from God anyway.  At least I believe so.

And...I know that not everyone follows the same path to their dreams.

If they did, it really would be an easy, duplicatable, three-step system, right?

So...I might not be the best leader to follow if you're looking for the nuts-and-bolts, dollars-and-cents of internet marketing and home business.

But if you want something else...

if you want something that may not even exist yet...

if you want to be creative and live in freedom and enjoy a romantic, juicy, and sexy existence and never, ever worry about the fucking money...

(because you don't have to worry about it, and worrying is useless, and there is so much abundance at your fingertips right now, without your having to do anything, that it trumps all the money in the universe, really...)

then stick around.

Because the things I have to share are for you.

My friend Astra Spider, who I used to perform shamanic dance with a few years ago, is running a 21 day creativity challenge over on Facebook.  It costs nothing to participate (there is an opportunity to donate to the work if you so desire).

And I'm blown away by the love and the creativity and the passion that the participants in this group have to share with one another, and the positive vibes that I have received from being a part of it.

So I'd like to share this with you.

Exercising your just one supremely fulfilling way to tap into that infinite abundance that I've been talking about, that you will discover in your time and in your own way.

Over the next days, weeks, months, and years, I will share many others.

So, stick around.

Peace out,


Move together


Falling in love - deeply, freely, expressively - with the sun and the wind and the waves...

...I catch myself moving in step with an ocean five thousand miles away...

(I have lakes in the middle of a continent. He has islands in the middle of an ocean. The prairie grasses and the jungle trees sway together, moved by the same breeze.)

Sunlight on the surface of the lake speaks these words to me: "I will be with you wherever you choose to go."

Step into it. Deeper. Even deeper. Until the road back to where you came from closes behind you and there is, at last, only one direction to move.

I will be waiting for you there at the end of that road.



This totally made my day, hope it makes yours too :D

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